Thursday, November 15, 2007

I fear I am becoming the sweatpants lady....

I have always cringed at the thought of becoming a haggard looking woman, trudging through the grocery store in a baggy top, sweats and flip flops. Baby in the cart or on her arm, constantly nagging "no!" ..."don't touch that!"...."you can't have it because I SAID SO!". Rolling her eyes and brushing her disheveled hair out of her face as she looks to heavens for help.
It's not this bad yet, but I am afraid. Very afraid.
About 2 weeks ago, in the thick of my I-am-just-working-around-the-house-so-all-my-clothes-have-paint-on-them-but-maybe-it-looks-artsy? phase, I actually took the time to look in the mirror for a second. And there they were. At least 10 of them. Yep, you guessed it...gray hairs. Sigh. Now, I am NOT a terribly vain person, and I KNOW it's not the end of the world. I actually think it looks awesome on some women when they pull off the all over shiny silver look. I am just not that woman...yet! But for me, at 27, it sucks pretty bad. To top it off, that same day, I noticed a disgusting sound my knees made as I descended the stairs from our second floor. Then the pain joined the sound. Imagine crinkling up tissue paper. For those who know me well, I cannot stand the thought, sound, idea of cartilage or bones moving in unnatural ways. When people pop ANYTHING around me, I cringe and my stomach hurts. So now, I can't walk down our stairs without focusing on that sound. I have started counting the steps out loud to mask it.
Finally, I decided to do something, at least about my hair. I had my appointment this afternoon with Tyson, whom I love. I got a color, highlight and cut, and a brow wax. I left the salon thinking this was just what I needed to feel better...Now, I will go home, put on makeup and start wearing my heels again!
Instead, I took a nap with Charlie, threw on my black loungy pants and a brown, yes brown tank with, yes...turquoise paint on it. Threw together a LOVELY dinner of chicken (frozen, mind you) sandwiches and instant pasta (Garlic shells).
I need to know how off the mark I was when I envisioned myself as a mother. Strutting through the grocery store in pointy boots and flared jeans, baby happily riding in the cart or in my trendy Ergo carrier...Great hair day, my bag matches my shoes, I'm buying only organic, extra broccoli, because it's baby's faaaaavorite. I'm even wearing jewelery! ...Obviously the envy of all the other moms in the store.
Okay, I am being a little silly. Of course I did not think it would be that easy. I am just struggling to find the balance between the girl I was not long ago, and the mom I am now. I still want to be the same, to a point. I don't want to recede into this hole until I surpass the horror of being the sweatpants lady, and become (GASP!) the spandex and old band tee shirt lady.
Sorry is this post sounds horribly vain. It's just been on my mind lately, and I am sure on the minds of the people who see me daily and wonder whether they should say something or not. Tomorrow I will TRY to get ready for the day like a normal human and maybe hit that grocery store. :)
Good night, all!

16 comments:

Gypsy said...

HA!! Well sweat pants lady, I am officially the gym shorts lady. Pretty much has become my "at home (and grocery store) uniform. I do this for two reason. 1)Incredibly easy to change tshirts when the baby slimes me and 2) I figure if it LOOKS like I just came from the gym people will just think, "Oh she's athletic" I have a feeling the thick thighs and tire tummy give that one away. The bright side to all this is one day when Charlie is really talking (In his case, I predict next Thursday. Man that kid's smart!) He will tell you that you're beautiful. And then my friend, you will never doubt that you aren't.

stephanie said...

I loved this post, Heather! Since I stopped working, I've become the hair-up-in-a-ponytail, yoga paints wearing lady. And I don't even have my baby yet!!

Diane said...

I have all these same fears and unrealistic expectations, except I'm 41!! Can I still wear Manolos and be a mom? I ask myself this everyday.

Wendy said...

We brought Wodajo home in December, in February I had my hair colored for the first time EVER. Coincidence?

Went to playgroup yesterday and I made it a point to wear my heeled boots because I was so sick of my sneakers. Although, to be fair, Wodajo himself wasn't at the playgroup (he was at school) so I just went to hang with the other Moms....

Katie & Ryan said...

I am so the sweatpants lady..I go for the sweatpants & long sweater look...like everyday...not good.
In fact, yesterday I ran out to buy beer for Ryan and didn't get carded (GASP!) I always get carded! I must really be looking old & haggard lately!

Anonymous said...

HAHA!!!
I am cracking up b/c I think I have had the same vision! I will definitely have it all together when I go to Whole Foods :) I mean really, how hard can it be??

I Kid I kid!!
Virginia

Catherine and Dustin said...

Well I am with Stephanie and I have become the yoga pants lady! I don't know what to tell you because I am in the same boat. I think the two of us going shopping would help us to feel better ;)

Jess Addison said...

I don't know what everyone is talking about. I always look Tim Gunn "fabulous!" when I'm out with Chase. Pfft!!

One woman's motherly sweatpants may be another woman's treasure though! Don't stress, you always look great!

Laura said...

My socks didn't match my shoes today... and I was looking in the mirror of the elevator at work and thinking back to when I wore my cute little Ann Taylor Loft sundresses and BCBG pointy toed shoes with my flawless mani/pedi and MAKE-UP ON AND CONTACTS for heaven sake!

... at least I only have 1 gray hair. :)

Deanna said...

Oh, I am so right there with you. We have been home 2 months with our little one and I actually get compliments just for NOT wearing a pony tail. You can always tell when someone is searching for something to compliment you on!! LOL

I loved this post, btw.

Anonymous said...

Love this post! Just this morning at chuch, my husband kept trying to clean my pants off and I got annoyed. He said, "you have snot all over the side of your pants!" My response: "so, its just snot..."

Oh - the joys of motherhood. :)

Handlyrics said...

This is great. You are giving me a lot to look forward to. LOL.

I somewhat had that vision too. Are you telling me to forget and invest in sneakers and sweats???

Chevella

Handlyrics said...

This is great. You are giving me a lot to look forward to. LOL.

I somewhat had that vision too. Are you telling me to forget and invest in sneakers and sweats???

Chevella

Jen and Dan said...

OMG I am cracking up so much at your post. So true Heather. I have imagined myself, at the grocery store, baby in tote, looking all perfect.... correction, looking stunning, with my precious little one trotting along ever so perfectly. Dreams are nice aren't they? Just remember Charlie thinks your darling no matter what and I suppose in the mist of it all that is all that really matters. Even though we looking fabulous amongst the drool, poop, fatigue and puke would be great wouldn't it?

cathy said...

My hairstylist is my new best friend... and I think I could rob a bank one day (dressed up) and the cops would come to my door the next and not recognize me...

Kerry and Tom said...

Heather,
Every since we got home with the twins and all their little bouts of illness i have officially become the sweatpants lady.
I even asked for a cute new pair for xmas... oh boy i am in big trouble....